So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
