Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
