i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
