I'm pants shitting drunk right now
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
