I forgot how hot balto sounded
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
