You just made me feel so damn special
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
