It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
