don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
