I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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