you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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