so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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