It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize