I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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