ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
