Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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