I think I just saw someone hide a body.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize