I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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