Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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