I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
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