please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
