What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
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