Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
