some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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