break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
