I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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