And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
