her vagine was all disorganized.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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