Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
