One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
