Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
