Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
