...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
being pregnant is like rehab
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
