He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
