OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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