i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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