what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
