Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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