yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Randomize
