He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
