Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
