I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
