so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
