How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
