Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
