So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
