How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Randomize