If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize
