Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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