She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
