and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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