i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Randomize
